— Contact

One inbox. One reply.

There is no phone number. There is no live chat. There is one inbox and we read it ourselves.

Who to reach.

What we will not respond to.

  • Phone calls. There is no phone number.
  • Letters. There is no mailing address.
  • Anything sent via LinkedIn.
  • The doorbell. We are not there.
  • The phrase "just a quick question."

Response time.

We answer everything within one business week. If a delivery is in progress and something has gone wrong, the support inbox is monitored continuously and you should expect a reply within twenty minutes — typically from a person named Theo, who is very calm.

Office hours.

We do not have an office. We do not have hours. We exist in a permanent state of "between 9pm and 11pm on a Tuesday." This is when we are most ourselves.


Real talk.

Weedamouse is a parody project. None of the email addresses above route to a real inbox — the .invalid top-level domain is reserved by the IETF for exactly this purpose. Nothing you send to them will reach anyone, including us.

To reach the actual humans who built this site, write to team@funnelsgenius.com or visit Funnels Genius.

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